When You Melt Ice in Your Hands
by Mercury M. Sunderland, Regular Contributor

when you melt ice in your hands

you will relish the feeling of being numb.

you will grab the cubes from the kitchen freezer

and sit at the dinner table

watching your own warmth

turning your emptiness into water.

it is well-known

that a common treatment

for borderline personality disorder

is sticking your face in a bowl of ice water.

it is effective

when you need to stop yourself

from the impulsive behaviors

of this mental illness.

today

i need to create a bowl of ice water.

yet again i have been spiraling into impulse

and i need to stop myself

before it is too late.

i go into the kitchen

and get the popcorn bowl.

i fill it with all the ice from the freezer

and pour water through the cracks.

i stick my face in

and hold my breath

for fifteen (15) seconds.

i let my face

feel the numbness

i lift my head

into this world.

i remember diogenes of greece

who wrote poetry

about the children who hold ice.

like the children

who hold ice

this is temporary.

and by the willness of neptune

i take a deep breath.

we are water

which is why

our eyes shed salt.

from my body

of prometheus’ clay

i am chains

and vultures

and a series of earthquakes.

the trauma

creating borderline

has distorted me

into multiple realities.

this ice

melts away

i will tremble

but i have seen another day.

like the children

who hold ice

this is temporary.

this time

i am not too late.

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